creationofwill: (FLIP: crack the berlin wall)
[personal profile] creationofwill
but when you're god, all you have to do
                                                 is lie


once upon a time, in the heart of one whom may someday be called a man, were the wishes of a young boy. he had committed sins and atoned, he had taken no action, every action, and sacrificed his whole being for another whose name was stamped deep into his heart. we could be talking about shinji ikari, we could be talking about kaworu nagisa. does it really matter all that much in the end?

their souls and wishes are the same and at the moment, they are being fulfilled. a perfect paradise cannot last forever, but one can try - can't they? try to remember, try to forget, try to be nothing more but two teenagers in an undisturbed peace at a summer home.

try, try, try. the longer a wait, the harder the fall, but maybe it was worth it after all.

Date: 2010-01-23 09:53 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymagicnumber.livejournal.com
Perhaps we will try once even though we know that it will do no good. Nothing in Shinji's life has ever done itself any good, if he can bury himsel into a blissful reality, then that's okay after all. If he thinks it then it exists, if he leaves it alone it does not.

He wants this to exist
and
he is god
and
all he has to do is lie

A summer home? Let's expand the picture a bit. It's almost dark and the fireflies are already out. Shinji is holding a glass jar on his chest, top unscrewed but even its existence forgotten. Why try to trap the fireflies for fun? Not even if it expanded their own, homemade jail.

It's humid out and he feels messy, but that's okay. He's a guy, nobodys gonna mind.

Date: 2010-01-23 11:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymagicnumber.livejournal.com
- "One night passed, fifteen to go."

His parents died long ago, right? That's what Shinji feels like. No, his dad doesn't have time, his mom is... becoming well?

That had been how he ha met Kaworu. It was an easy enough detail to believe. That he would heed to... become well. That Shinji would meet him this way. That they would get in trouble, that he would try anything he could to land in there and see the two over and over again, but that was why he was dumped and duped. Yeah.

Keeping straight of time was important and Shinji was the only one who could do it for the other okay. They couldn't split that up not ever ever ever. Okay? Okay.

Date: 2010-01-23 11:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymagicnumber.livejournal.com
He had to keep Kaworu here, didn't he? Otherwise he would lose him maybe forever. A few lies were okay to prevent that especially when he knew he made Kaworu the happiest.

"Yeah," he says, and laughs. "Alright."

In the tape goes.

Date: 2010-01-23 12:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymagicnumber.livejournal.com
Poor, poor Shinji has no choice with thia, because he knew it was all true. Pfft.

" I'm a space cowboy
Bet you weren't ready for that
I'm a space cowboy
I'm sure you know where it's at
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

I see the show downs, slow downs, lost and found, turn arounds
The boys in the military shirts
I keep my eyes on the prize, on the long fallen skies
And I don't let my friends get hurt
All you back room schemers, small trip dreamers
Better find something new to say
Cause you're the same old story
It's the same old crime
And you got some heavy dues to pay
"

...

"Kill me now." Sweet, sweet relief.

Date: 2010-01-23 12:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mymagicnumber.livejournal.com
Doesn't Kaworu know by now that Shinji would allow him anything?! Catch a clue, Woru, even if it takes awhile. They have awhile, after all.

Touch a little under the shirt, feel the warm temperature, find it weir as always that if he touches Kaworu's hair that likes to curl in this sort of weather, yet again wonder how it can act like it does and be such a soft texture. Kiss him for what seems the millionth time since they got here, ignore dinner and get into worthy trouble. Always, always want that. Even if he was stealing right now. Let it last as long as possible he'll take the punishment in the end.

. . .In other words, please be true
In other words, I love you. . .


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