creationofwill: (FLIP: sixth hour has past)
one has to wonder how far a strange, strange world can go into affecting those within it. would one figure out eventually that they are not in their own reality? would they not wish to? kaworu feels as if he is forgetting more and more important facts every day. writing them down does not help, asking gets him more medicine. he would rather not continue down that road, therefore e ha started to keep his opinions and queries to himself.

he does not like looking at the stars and he avoids it whenever ecessary. how odd, how strange, ow quaint. but he had told all of this to a girl at school oe day - he is not sure why she seeed particularly appealing to speak to, but she had, and mandy of her problems were similar to his. However, there was no phone up here, no radio, just complete isolation. he doesn't like it at all.

but what are you oing to do it about it? well, that is what he is trying to figure out while fidgeting. staying still would do him no use right now, but either way, he was not going to try.
creationofwill: (FLIP: crack the berlin wall)
but when you're god, all you have to do
                                                 is lie


once upon a time, in the heart of one whom may someday be called a man, were the wishes of a young boy. he had committed sins and atoned, he had taken no action, every action, and sacrificed his whole being for another whose name was stamped deep into his heart. we could be talking about shinji ikari, we could be talking about kaworu nagisa. does it really matter all that much in the end?

their souls and wishes are the same and at the moment, they are being fulfilled. a perfect paradise cannot last forever, but one can try - can't they? try to remember, try to forget, try to be nothing more but two teenagers in an undisturbed peace at a summer home.

try, try, try. the longer a wait, the harder the fall, but maybe it was worth it after all.
creationofwill: (sixth hour has past)
Kaworu is aware of the feel of life, but he does not open his eyes because of it. He is aware of the familiar smells, antiseptic and and disinfectants. He is aware of his own breathing, which he keeps slow and low, in case this is a place that is not friendly to Tabris. (All places are friendly to Kaworu Nagisa. That was just the way things worked.)

He has a feeling he ought to be dead. He's unsure of why - if he tries to catch the memories, they flow through his fingers like sand, little hints and clues that could never be puzzled out in such a way. All Kaworu remembers last is the First being reported as alive again. Hah, maybe NERV was in the practice of killing off excess Childrens.

Well, you won't learn anything if you don't go back to the world, will you?

Honestly, why did they all need an incessant voice at the back of their head, telling them what it thinks they should do? But he expels his air normally now, opens his eyes. He has no idea what he will find, but at least Kaworu can take comfort in the fact that it will be interesting.
creationofwill: (FLIP: fifth children)
Life is very different when there are no humans around. For most of his life, Kowaru had varied between opinions about what should be done with his own self and his own will. He had never even learned that 'will' existed until he was 12. He did not learn that he could employ it for himself until he was 14. And then he died.

He's alive now. He's alive, due to the same boy who'd brought about his death. But it was likely that far more of Shinji died that day than of Tabrisadamkaworu. It was something to make up for, now. He can apply his free will for this.

The first thing to do would be to gather provisions. He had left around two hours ago, when Shinji was asleep, to trek up that broken and bent highway in an attempt to find something usable. He found enough to pass them for now. What he has to hope is that Shinji had not woken up in his absence.

He does not even bother with the long or safe way to get back - he haphazardly makes his way down the hill nearby; slipping and sliding and falling at the end, but a few cuts and scrapes do not matter to him. And ah, he makes it back soon enough - but what will he have to deal with?

November 2010

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