blood running through my veins

[creationofwill]

Kaworu is aware of the feel of life, but he does not open his eyes because of it. He is aware of the familiar smells, antiseptic and and disinfectants. He is aware of his own breathing, which he keeps slow and low, in case this is a place that is not friendly to Tabris. (All places are friendly to Kaworu Nagisa. That was just the way things worked.)

He has a feeling he ought to be dead. He's unsure of why - if he tries to catch the memories, they flow through his fingers like sand, little hints and clues that could never be puzzled out in such a way. All Kaworu remembers last is the First being reported as alive again. Hah, maybe NERV was in the practice of killing off excess Childrens.

Well, you won't learn anything if you don't go back to the world, will you?

Honestly, why did they all need an incessant voice at the back of their head, telling them what it thinks they should do? But he expels his air normally now, opens his eyes. He has no idea what he will find, but at least Kaworu can take comfort in the fact that it will be interesting.

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[breaksdown.livejournal.com]

Shinji doesn't know how long he'd been sitting (waiting) beside the hospital bed. Long enough to get tired. His elbows dig into the edge of the mattress, head turned away from the patient, staring at the black door. How long has it been like that? It's when his chin suddenly dips that Shinji jolts out of his half-dreams and sees the reality: The door is white, not black. With a silver handle that's not been broken off.

It's a quiet place, this room. Noise drowned into an indistinguishable murmur between white walls and faraway realities. It's not peaceful, just void. If he opens the door, will someone or something be there?

Kaworu sleeps.

Should that be strange? Somehow, but Shinji doesn't have the energy to wade through the muddy black space inside his head to seek an answer. It's so much more comfortable to wait. It could be that Shinji is waiting for nothing, but that's fine. He's alone, but Kaworu is also there. Even if he never wakes and Shinji doesn't hear or say a single word ever again, that's fine too. Because Shinji isn't really alone. Isn't he?

His chin slowly dips...

The door is black again.