blood running through my veins
Oct. 20th, 2009 04:30 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
creationofwillKaworu is aware of the feel of life, but he does not open his eyes because of it. He is aware of the familiar smells, antiseptic and and disinfectants. He is aware of his own breathing, which he keeps slow and low, in case this is a place that is not friendly to Tabris. (All places are friendly to Kaworu Nagisa. That was just the way things worked.)
He has a feeling he ought to be dead. He's unsure of why - if he tries to catch the memories, they flow through his fingers like sand, little hints and clues that could never be puzzled out in such a way. All Kaworu remembers last is the First being reported as alive again. Hah, maybe NERV was in the practice of killing off excess Childrens.
Well, you won't learn anything if you don't go back to the world, will you?
Honestly, why did they all need an incessant voice at the back of their head, telling them what it thinks they should do? But he expels his air normally now, opens his eyes. He has no idea what he will find, but at least Kaworu can take comfort in the fact that it will be interesting.
He has a feeling he ought to be dead. He's unsure of why - if he tries to catch the memories, they flow through his fingers like sand, little hints and clues that could never be puzzled out in such a way. All Kaworu remembers last is the First being reported as alive again. Hah, maybe NERV was in the practice of killing off excess Childrens.
Well, you won't learn anything if you don't go back to the world, will you?
Honestly, why did they all need an incessant voice at the back of their head, telling them what it thinks they should do? But he expels his air normally now, opens his eyes. He has no idea what he will find, but at least Kaworu can take comfort in the fact that it will be interesting.
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no subject
Date: 2009-10-22 02:21 am (UTC)It's a quiet place, this room. Noise drowned into an indistinguishable murmur between white walls and faraway realities. It's not peaceful, just void. If he opens the door, will someone or something be there?
Kaworu sleeps.
Should that be strange? Somehow, but Shinji doesn't have the energy to wade through the muddy black space inside his head to seek an answer. It's so much more comfortable to wait. It could be that Shinji is waiting for nothing, but that's fine. He's alone, but Kaworu is also there. Even if he never wakes and Shinji doesn't hear or say a single word ever again, that's fine too. Because Shinji isn't really alone. Isn't he?
His chin slowly dips...
The door is black again.
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Date: 2009-10-22 10:49 am (UTC)He can hazard a few guesses, considering that at the moment, they can only be located in the Cranial Nerv. Kaworu would really like to remember what it was, but at the moment, Kaworu's going to try a brand new tactic, one that he's never employed before: never look the gift horse in the mouth.
Lilim practices, whether or not they could be pulled off successfully, certainly were helpful when tried.
Shinji sleeps. Kaworu watches him and finally risks a gamble, settling a hand on Shinji's hair. He could get yelled at, smacked, or pushed away - he's used to all of those things.
But there are no ill or adult intentions here. Just... comfort, for one or both of them.
Kaworu waits.
no subject
Date: 2009-10-23 06:48 am (UTC)Someone's hand.
Shinji turns away from the not-black door, distracted by the alien pressure against his head. No one does that. It feels good, in a way, and Shinji can't help but subconsciously lean towards it. It's confusing enough that Shinji's dragged up from his dreaming, blinking away sleep and blurry images of charred doors.
It doesn't take a genius to realize whose hand it is on his hair.
Shinji swallows, suddenly a lot more awake. "Kaworu..."
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Date: 2009-10-23 09:44 am (UTC)"Ah, you are awake, then," he says. He considers adding 'took you long enough' as a joke to save face, but Shinji would take it seriously. The results would not be spectacular.
"Have you been waiting long?"
He may have to scold himself for that!
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Date: 2009-10-24 05:22 am (UTC)He'd imagined what he'd say or do when Kaworu finally woke up. All of them optimistic and ideal, and of course, that fantasy quickly receded in the face of materialization.
For one, Kaworu wasn't supposed to wake up before him.
"Just a little tired... How are you feeling?" Why does he have to sound so awkward?
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Date: 2009-10-24 08:25 am (UTC)"Were there more injuries with the battle against Armisael?" How careless of him, really.
But he takes a smug satisfaction in the fact it took Shinji that long to move his hand.
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Date: 2009-10-25 04:32 am (UTC)He shakes his head after a second. And the words that come out of his mouth are natural, sitting together in perfect sequence. "Misato said it could have been worse... No one really told me anything. Rei's been hospitalized too..." Here, a tiny bit of guilt stabs him. "I should probably go see how she is later. But..." His father is probably already there.
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Date: 2009-10-25 07:15 am (UTC)"You wished to see me before the First? Were you bored?"
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Date: 2009-10-25 07:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-10-25 08:08 am (UTC)Tell me, do I still have all my parts? At least the important ones.I want to use those."
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Date: 2009-10-25 08:52 am (UTC)"Important ones?" He pauses. "I don't think anything is missing..." He glances towards the door. Should he go ask someone if anything was really wrong? (Oh, dramatic irony.)
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Date: 2009-10-27 05:16 am (UTC)"Something is wrong with you."
Good observation, Holmes.